Thursday, August 4

Alicia Watson: BB True Hollywood Story

SOTD: OneRepublic "Good Life"



To many, my obsession with Big Brother is probably borderline insane. But what most of you don't know is that I have watched this show since the very first season and have even gone through the casting process three times over the course of the last twelve years!

The first season premiered the summer before I went away to college. My mom and I were hooked all summer and when I moved away that fall, we would call each other and watch it together over the phone long distance. As any mother/daughter relationship goes, there were times when we had little or nothing to say to each other, but we kept these phone dates and if nothing else, Big Brother was our topic for conversation. This ritual continued with each year I lived away from home and even now, we look forward to the beginning of July more because we know the house guests have been chosen and are moving in than we do for the holiday on the 4th!
 
The first time I applied to be on the show was a fluke. I was working with J. Crew at West Town Mall in Knoxville in the Spring of 2003. The production team had set up shop outside the store to hold an open casting call. I had half an hour for lunch and nothing to do, so I filled out an application and sat down with a producer for a brief on-camera interview.
 
I didn't hear back that season, so I assumed that my dreams of becoming one of the hamsters picked to have my every move recorded within the confines of the BB house were pretty much over. But low and behold, out of the blue, around the end of March 2004, I received a phone call from the casting directors and they had not forgotten about me. I didn't know this at the time, but the twist for that season would be Project DNA: Do Not Assume, and based on the information I had provided on my application a year earlier, I was looking like a good candidate for one of their DNA related twists. For several weeks I continued to conduct phone interviews with the casting department and eventually my options for the Summer of 2004 began to take an interesting shape.
 
I was working on my first year of graduate school at the time, and not knowing that BB would come calling, I had signed up to spend my summer in Paris, France participating in a study abroad program designed around the concept of communication in global business markets. In fact, our trip was set to begin with a flight out of America on the 4th of July.
 
So as May approached and I continued to receive phone calls to request more information related to possibly being cast on the upcoming season of BB, I was starting to think that perhaps instead of heading across the pond for the summer, I might be traveling to the left coast and I began to get really excited. It was Mother's Day weekend when I got the call that sent me over the edge.
 
I got a call that Saturday from a guy on the casting team, once again requesting additional information and following up on other statements from my application. But this time, before he hung up, he said, "...if there is anything that you've shared with us that might come out on national television, that your family is not aware of, this would be a good time to fill them in." The following day, Mother's Day, I called my mother and filled her in on every possible thing that might be upsetting if she had heard about it for the first time with the rest of America. (Since I was not cast, and so far, have still not been cast, I will spare you the juicy details. Just know that to this day, I refer to this as the year I ruined Mother's Day.)
 
I received one last call from the casting associates for that season around the beginning of June. It was still unclear if I would be heading to LA for the final interviews, but I was told if I didn't hear from them within the next week, I could assume I would not be joining the cast that season. A week passed and I bought my flight to Paris. Coincidentally, on the same day that I flew to Europe for my summer abroad, the chosen house guests were entering the BB house to start the season. 
 
A few years later, I submitted another application. I had become a really big fan of the show and due to the writer's strike, BB had a special Spring edition. I didn't get the application in time to be considered for that season, but a few months later (March 2008), out of the blue, I got a call from the casting directors asking if I would be interested in possibly being considered for the upcoming summer season. They asked me to submit another application and video before April 1st.
 
Once again, I begin to feel a rush of excitement at the possibility and began working on what would become over 20 pages of application. I spent days thinking about the video submission and eventually ended up filming the entire thing in one take while sitting on the counter top of a fake set in the empty studios at my office. On March 31st, I shipped all the materials overnight to the casting department. I received one follow up email and then nothing more. Once again, my dreams were shattered.
 
I am determined to play this game. I have not applied for either of the last two seasons. Mostly because I put on some extra weight after my move to Atlanta last year and I didn't feel comfortable with myself enough to really go for it. However, that weight is starting to come off, more and more with each passing month and I fully expect I will be ready to try again for next season.
 
I don't want to be on the show because I want to be famous or for the 'celebrity' of it. I want to be on the show to play the game! Each year, when I watch at home, I am envious of the people who are chosen to participate. I always believe I would play the mental game better and the actual physical games seem like so much fun, I just really want to be a part of it all; one of the chosen few.
 
So, you see, what might seem obsessive to some is simply my dream waiting to come true!
 

Monday, August 1

BB13: better 3 weeks late than never

When this season started, I intended to post regular updates, at least 2 or 3 a week, to address things happening in the house and on the broadcast episodes. Unfortunately, I have found myself with less spare time lately and I have already fallen really behind this season. So is life...



Here are my thoughts on the first four weeks of game play, in a nut shell (of course!):

WEEK #1:
HOH: Rachel
Nominated: Keith & Porsche
Veto: Brendon (not used)
Evicted: Keith

Positive: For the first time in many seasons, the first eviction vote was not unanimous. Typically, for fear of making early enemies, everyone tends to band together and cast a unified vote for the first several weeks, but this season, that practice came to a halt. Primarily, because of the Newbies vs. Veterans twist, but nonetheless, it was great to see actual game play in the first week. (Too bad it didn't last...see week 2)
 
Negative: The wrong person was sent home. I wrongly predicted it would be Porsche, and had the Newbies stuck to their original alliance/agreement it would have been. But low and behold, there were TWO over-achievers among the new cast who just couldn't help themselves. Kalia and, in a shocking turn of events, Shelly, decided to band with the Veterans and vote out Keith. I still can't figure out how saving Porsche benefitted anyone other than Rachel, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.
 
Highlight of the week: Trying to size everyone up during episodes and live-feeds to see how accurate my first impression assumptions for the season actually were. For the most part, my gut instinct did not change. Cassi, Dominic and Lawon were my favorites going into to the new season and they were still my favorites at the end of the first week. I did expect to like Kalia more than I actually do and I wasn't sure how much I would enjoy having Daniele back, but all in all, my opinions didn't change after week one.


WEEK #2:
HOH: Jordan
Nominated: Adam & Dominic
Veto: Dominic (used)
Replacement Nominees: Shelly & Cassi
Evicted: Cassi


Positive: Still enjoying the season. Not much else to be happy about for Week 2. Although, I have to say, I did enjoy watching Cassi confront Rachel and stand up to Brendon. It was nice to see that she didn't go down without a fight and when she left the house, her dignity was still intact. Also, it was really sweet to see Shelly so motherly this week and interesting to see her so guilt stricken over the actions she took the week before that led to her partner being evicted. I feel she might have realized the error of her ways, just a little bit too late.
 
Negative: My favorite player for the season was sent home. I'm not sure why I was so gung-ho for Cassi, but the fact is, she was my pick from even before the first episode aired. She has a southern charm, a level head and seems to be very personable. Based on personality, she is definitely someone I would have aligned myself with if I were in the game.  To watch as Rachel targeted her, for what still appears to be no reason at all, I was absolutely disgusted. I understand protecting your loyalties, but come on Rachel, why is it so important that you defend Porsche? Isn't she adult enough to fight her own battles? I mean, she already has the golden key and is guaranteed safety through the final 10! Really?!? What did Cassi ever do to you? Also, it was very classy the way you threw one last punch with your 'good-bye message'.
 
Highlight of the week: Having my suspicion confirmed at the end of the live show that there would soon be yet another twist, giving hope to the possibility that Cassi might be allowed to return to the game...(more on this later).


WEEK #3:
HOH: Rachel (again...ugh!)
Nominated: Adam & Dominic
Veto: Brendon (not used)
Evicted: Dominic
 
Positive: It seems that cracks are finally beginning to form in the veteran alliance. Jeff & Jordan have expressed doubts about Rachel/Brendon and especially Dani. It might finally be time to shake things up a bit. Also, thrilled to hear confirmation the Keith & Cassi had, in fact, been kept in sequester following their evictions, making the possibility of Cassi's return even more real!
 
Negatives: Another week of Brenchel in power and the absence of Cassi... Enough said.

Highlight of the week: Everything finally came to a head when it was outted that Daniele was the source of the conspiracy to try to get Brenchel to use the veto and backdoor Jeff/Jordan. During the house meeting, Daniele finally spoke up with those classic words, "Rachel, you're an idiot!" Classic.


***No longer playing in teams***

SPOILERS BELOW!!!


Week #4
HOH: Daniele
Nominated: Brendon & Rachel
POV: Brendon (used to save Rachel)
Replacement Nominee: Jordan (w/ Brendon)

Positives: Daniele is back in the game and out for blood. She wanted to shake things up, and it looks like she's gonna get her wish! I for one was thrilled to see Dani hang in there; everyone had written her off, but I knew as soon as she was allowed to rejoin the games, she would give Rachel a run for her money!

Negatives: Once again, Brendon has won POV. Although earlier today he used it to save Rachel, the game is getting stale. Rachel has won every HOH she's played and Brendon has won 3 of the 4 POVs. The remaining newbies aren't proving to be much in the way of competitors and the vets continue to run the house. I'm really hoping an evicted newbie *Cassi* gets to return to the game this week!

Highlight of the week: none so far...


My prediction is that Brendon will be evicted this week (duh!) and Rachel will continue to cry and lie until long after his duffel bag crosses the thresh-hold of the front door.


As the weeks pass and the game gets more interesting, I will post more of my own thoughts about the game. But for now, this group isn't giving me too much to work with! Feel free to leave your own thoughts below.





 
 

Sunday, July 10

BB13: one you love, one you hate and one you love to hate

SOTD: Sting & the Police - "I'll Be Watching You"



Big Brother 13 kicked off Thursday night, with the most interesting start I've seen in at least 4 seasons! With 52 cameras and 95 microphones catching every moment and whisper, this is bound to be an interesting summer!!

This season's cast of 14 house guests includes eight strangers: Dominic, Lawon, Shelly, Porsche, Keith, Cassi, Kalia & Adam and six former 'dynamic duos' teased by CBS on twitter as "one you love, one you hate and one you love to hate". Turns out, the one we love: Jeff/Jordan BB11, one we hate: Brendan/Rachel BB12 & one we love to hate: Evil Dick*/Danielle Donato BB8. And already a game altering departure has taken place.
*More on the case of the missing Dick later!

KEITH: "The Lord is my Shepard and he KNOWS my WANTS!"

Not long after the 8 strangers entered the house and took part in the ritualistic, round table introductions, the Chen-bot appeared on the Living Room TV screen to reveal the first twist of the season. the house guests will be playing in pairs, at least until week 4, and when the HOH nominates two people for eviction, this season, those two people will be playing together. A duo once focused on helping each other will quickly have to turn on each other and campaign for themselves in order to survive. 

Unknowing of the alumni waiting outside, the 8 newbies paired up. For some the decision was easy and natural, but others were left less than optimistic when the pairings were complete.

DOMINIC: "And then out of nowhere...this loud, crazy, martini-sipping 90210-loving, bacon eater, wants to be my partner...if I say 'no', I might die right now...if I say 'yes', I'm obviously gonna be this man's jail-buddy"

Then the doorbell rings and the first of the 3 returning pairs enter the house, it's Rachel & Brendan and no one looks thrilled...Next, it's Jeff & Jordan and the newbies are starting to show signs of being both scared & star-struck...And finally, The most infamous duo in BB history walks through the door, father/daughter team, Evil Dick & Danielle Donato.

ADAM: "Evil Dick is one of the main reasons I wanted to be on Big Brother..it's like Tori Spelling walked through the door!" 

It didn't take long for ED to begin spewing his arrogance throughout the house and I don't think anyone was more offended than little Jordan, especially when ED proclaimed he was the only winner among the group, when in fact, he won season 8, but Jordan was the season 11 winner! He quickly began to sweet-talk his way out of this one!

JORDAN: "Dick makes me feel like chopped liver. And I hate chopped liver."

HOH #1: Going Bananas
Each pair must hold on to an oversized swinging banana while being sprayed with chocolate syrup & later, whipped cream. How the teams position themselves on the banana is entirely up to them, but the last one hanging is HOH.

HG dropped in this order: Shelly, Jordan, Keith, Cassi, Lawon, Adam, Jeff, Dominic, Brendan, Kalia, Porsche...leaving Dick, Daniele and Rachel.

Rachel cut a deal with ED & Dani and sealed her fate as the first HOH. But the game has changed and Rachel will have to take many other factors into consideration before she places her first pair up on the block. 

This season, if you survive being nominated against your partner and don't get evicted, you are given the 'Golden Key' which secures your place in the final ten and prevents you from being nominated until only ten other HG remain.

RACHEL: "So this Golden Key is pretty much the ultimate floater!"

And with that final twist revealed, the first episode was over. But if you know me, you know I live for Big Brother After Dark, which airs nightly on Showtime2 from midnight to 3am (11p - 2a CT). This season is no different.

But imagine my surprise when I tune in for the first broadcast only to land smack in the middle of what I'm sure will be come to known as 'The case of the missing Dick'! BBAD started an hour later than normal on the night of the premiere episode, but the HG were not aware of the late start or the location of one of their very own; it wouldn't be easy to hide the faul mouthed, chain-smoking, Evil Dick, but somehow, he was MIA for what ended up being over 6 hours. And in the end, it was revealed, at least in part, the ED had left the game for personal reasons, Dani got a Golden Key, ED would not be returning & more would be revealed on Wednesday night's pre-taped show.

I smell another season of playing favorites and using the Donatos to grab ratings, but hey, what do I know?!? 

CASSI: "You're not sleeping in my bed...STOP!"

While I am making outlandish comments and wild speculations, here are a few other things that have caught my attention...
-While Jeff & Jordan seem closer than ever, it would appear that Jeff has an eye for Cassi, even if he can't get her name right (he keeps calling her Casey!)
-Danielle, which her non-signature dark brown locks, is not as fun as her (often dull) blonde self from BB8
-Is it just me, or do these people not seem to be annoyed by Rachel? I was certain the oxygen she inhaled was annoyed by her, how can these people seem so at ease with the idea of being summer-long roommates?
- Cassi looks like a cross between Olivia Wilde and Kate Middleton...anyone else think so?!?

And as for predictions...I am pulling for Cassi, Jeff, Shelly, Jordan and Danielle in the final 5 & ultimately, I want Cassi or Jeff to win. If Cassi forms an alliance with Dani, they could run the house, but time will tell what the BB house holds for these HGs and you must always be prepared to "expect the unexpected". 

Here are a few final questions I've got about BB13:
- What happened to the Library room? I would have totally chosen a bed in this room, but I haven't seen it once since BBAD started on Thursday night.
- What happens if POV is used while couple nominating is in play?
- Is it possible to cast house guests outside the Hollywood machine (i.e. people who aren't models and don't have agents)?
- WHERE IS EVIL DICK?!?

Until next time.... 

Wednesday, July 6

honest reaction

Not to confuse my summer obsession with what is sure to be remembered as one of the low points of the summers of 2008 & 2011, but I just watched my favorite host react on live television as she heard the verdict come down yesterday and I felt compelled to share it here.

I tried to embed, but alas could not figure it out...use this link to view the video on it's original site.

No doubt my next post will have little if nothing to do with Casey Anthony and most likely, be entirely focused on the start and predictions for the upcoming season of Big Brother, but this is an interesting bridge that I will use to move forward.

As Nancy Grace would say, "Goodnight Friend".

Tuesday, July 5

disservice of justice

SOTD: TBD (feel free to suggest one of your own)

I still remember, while getting ready for work, listening to the Today show and hearing the audio from the very first call Cindy made to 911 when Casey finally admitted that after 31 days Caylee had been missing.

I remember, as the sorted details about how the child went missing and the events that occupied her mother's time began to unfold, how I watched in disbelief that someone could be so reckless with not only her life, but the life of her innocent daughter.

I remember becoming obsessed with this case when the jailhouse tapes were released and it seemed that each day held more clues as to where little Caylee might be, still alive, and Casey's behavior and dialogue with her brother and parents provided insight into her sociopathic mind.

I remember watching live coverage on CNN, December 2008, while sitting at my desk at work when remains were uncovered in a wooded area just blocks from the Anthony home. Perhaps this is the thing I remember most. Countless tips had passed through the family with little more than a smirk of acknowledgement from Casey, but on the day these remains were found Casey had a panic attack that required the assistance of a doctor, before a positive ID had even been made. This is the day I no longer had a reasonable doubt that Casey committed this hanious crime.

I found myself unemployed with nothing but time on my hands in January of 2009. It had become regular practice for me at this point to tune in each night to hear the latest on Nancy Grace and any other program that might feature new details as they emerged. My interest in this case grew exponentially when I no longer had my work to focus on; there are some who might say my obsession with this case was my way of displacing the void that was created when I lost my job, and the truth is, they are probably right.

Regardless of why I was obsessed, make no mistake, I was consumed with a need to know every possible detail that might come to light. Countless nights were spent scrolling through, hundreds, maybe thousands of pages of evidence and depositions. I read every text message that was placed into evidence. I watched and re-watched the jail tapes for clues in the dialogue and body language between Casey & whichever family member she might be talking to. I searched tirelessly until I found the mysterious message that Cindy posted and then retracted from her MySpace page.

Like many, I have questioned how much Cindy & George really knew and when they knew it. My belief is that they knew the child was dead long before the body was found, but I don't believe for one second that either of them had a hand in her death. I do believe that if anyone knows the complete truth, it is Lee Anthony, Casey's brother. There seems to be a bond between these two that goes far beyond the 'incestuous' relationship the defense claimed (which I don't believe actually happened by George or Lee), but from jailhouse tape conversations, the reference to CMA at Caylee's memorial and Lee's limited presence for the trial (he was only present for the day he was subpoenaed as a witness), I strongly believe these two are thick as thieves and if she confided in anyone, it was him.

Here's where I think the case was lost: the motive. The prosecution argued that the motive for killing Caylee was that she was beginning to talk and Casey was afraid she wouldn't be able to keep up her lies. I don't believe this because anyone who can look an officer in the eye and lie to their face about where they work and then get into a squad car and hold steady to that lie all the way to the point that a member of the human resources personnel staff is standing in front of both of them explaining that she has not been an employee for over a year, isn't worried about the ramblings of a toddler.

Instead, I believe her motive was not driven by a desire to end Caylee's life so much as it was to punish her mother by taking Caylee out of her life for good. It was only briefly mentioned during the trial, but on the last night the Anthony's saw Caylee alive, Casey and her mother got into a huge fight over checks Casey stole from her elderly grandmother. The exchange got so heated that Cindy grabbed Casey around the neck and began to choke her. It was a month later, when allegations that Casey wrote checks she stole from a friend on the infamous Target shopping trip, that Cindy showed up to Universal Studios, where Casey told her she was working that day, to find that not only did her daughter not work there, but she claimed to be in Jacksonville with Caylee only to fess up days later that Caylee had been missing for over a month.

A reoccurring theme that was present through all the depositions and collective evidence was how self-centered Casey was. From the story of how Casey resented that Cindy was the first person to hold Caylee after she was born, to the report that Cindy actually preferred Caylee call her 'Mom', there is no doubt that from the moment her life began, Caylee was the center of Cindy's universe. Casey, on the other hand, was no longer the center of attention, no matter how hard she tried. I don't believe she ever really took to the role of mother and over time, I believe she began to resent Caylee for even being born.

Getting back to the motive, after the fight with her mother, I believe Casey left that night with the intent to hurt her mother the only way she knew how, to completely remove Caylee from her life forever. Blinded by rage, I believe she began to set motions in action that eventually proved devastating for little Caylee.

The prosecution did a great job, but despite their best efforts, I believe there were two factors that determined the outcome of this trial; the first was when Casey chose not to take the stand. Perhaps the single smartest thing she's ever done, by keeping her mouth shut, she contained her voice within the two and three year old recordings which her attorney came out at the very beginning and acknowledged contained multiple lies. The second factor was the jury. Whether it was the possible death sentence or a misunderstanding of the definition of 'reasonable doubt', once details about personal predisposition of each of the individual jurors began to emmerge, I had a gut feeling Casey would eventually walk free. However, I was not prepared for the jury to only convict her of lying to law enforcement. At the very least, the evidence of child abuse was present, but the fact is, as soon as this Thursday, Casey Anthony might be released, free and clear. I have to wonder how someone like Casey Anthony is expected to live a normal life after captivating the entire country with her lies and self-destructive behavior.

I remember many things about the events that surrounded this case and eventually, the trial, but after today, I will forever remember how inefficient our justice system truly is. I suppose justice comes in many forms and eventually, I believe justice will be served for the death of little Caylee Marie Anthony.